Good-Bye To My MVP
With every sport and season there is an MVP. And yet, this award is never given for being a good family man. There should be. I said goodbye to my MVP on December 28th.
My dad was not a sports icon or social media influencer. But he offered a path to success and led by example.
As a kid, my dad often came across as gruff. If he was hungry, he was grumpy. But if you fed him, he was your friend for life. It is amazing what a meal can do to improve one’s disposition.
Other times, he had good reason to be grumpy. He was raising three kids, paying bills, putting food on the table and working a very technical job. You never know what someone is dealing with until you walk in their shoes.
Many of the things my father taught were lessons in discipline, responsibility, grit, and problem solving.
He showed that consistently doing your job is like compound interest. Over the short run it is hard to see progress. However, over decades the cumulative effects build geometrically.
My brothers are very smart. However, our parents never compared us. They only asked one question. “Did you try your hardest?”
My parents made us look in the mirror and honestly assess our efforts. If we did all we could, and the outcome still wasn’t favorable, sometimes that is life. It helped us accept responsibility, deal with hardship and overcome obstacles.
Growing up, there were no allowances. Instead, there were jobs. There were weeds to pull, lawns to mow and cars to wash. If you wanted money, go earn it. A job, and cash, solves many problems.
Both my parents were the first of their families to go to college. My dad knew the power and leverage of an education.
He earned undergraduate and master’s degrees in electrical engineering. He added more graduate work in computer design while working full-time and raising a family. My father knew investing in his education made him valuable and offered options. Never stop learning.
Given this, it was not a matter of “if” we’d go to college, but rather “where.”
We were not wealthy. My parents were frugal and disciplined. They lived life on their terms while ignoring others. What a great concept in the era of social media. They sacrificed to deliver better opportunities for the next generation.
Education was not given. Whether birthdays, Christmas or summer jobs, half of money received was contributed to our education fund. My parents wanted a high level of buy-in to ensure we took it seriously.
My dad experienced hard times in the shadow of the Great Depression and World War II. He was quite financially aware. Frugality and a constant awareness to save for a rainy day never left dad. Being poor, and figuring out how to not be poor, is a powerful teacher.
My father was a value investor before it was popular. He rarely used debt, bought used cars and drove them forever. He stretched every bit of use from every asset.
Growing up, there were many trips pulling the pop-up camper across the country. We saw every park possible. Seeing the great wonders in our country developed an appreciation for the world around us.
I never saw my dad on weekday mornings. He was gone by 6am driving 70 miles to White Sands Missile Range for decades.
My father oversaw testing and development of the Patriot Missile System. It was not until the first Gulf War that we understood what he did. Patriot protected the people of Kuwait as they were invaded by Iraq. Thirty years later the current iteration of Patriot is deploying to defend Ukraine against Russia.
After developing Patriot, Raytheon needed someone with high technical knowledge to discuss the merits of the system with allies. To facilitate this, my dad received Raytheon’s in-house MBA. He subsequently travelled the world meeting with foreign dignitaries and defense ministers discussing Patriot.
And yet my father never missed our activities. Dad served as Area Chairman for the Scouts, coached our little league teams, helped with volumes of homework and served as church council president numerous times. He taught us that every non-profit organization needs solid workers and leaders. Despite his schedule, he was consistently present in our lives.
Although my dad may never have been on SportsCenter, he was a great teacher, role model and my MVP.